I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
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