Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
