what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
i need some magic done to my vagina
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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