im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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