Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
someone owes me an orgasm
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
