WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
