I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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