11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
third nipple confirmed
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
