talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
