either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
When are your genitals available?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
