It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
