I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
