Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
