OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize