She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
