we made out on top of his cat.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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