So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
