Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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