so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
