haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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