we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
