Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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