I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
