i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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