My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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