he shaved USA in his pubs
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize
