I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Success! We fucked roommates!
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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