I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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