Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I can't trust your balls anymore.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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