med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
