from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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