Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
