I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
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