About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
