beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
