:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Sorry about my life...
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
