Banned from zoo.
Again?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
i came on her dog
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
This is the high leading the old right now
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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