I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
You dont lie about slip and slides
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Randomize
