So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
