i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
