what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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