I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
wow bdsm is so cute
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
