just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
