This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
