You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
