We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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