then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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