Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
