My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
