I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
you had me at cake vodka
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
