found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize