He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I just gargled with NyQuil
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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